Rebel Wilson

Filling Out The Cast

The cast of The Hunger Games franchise is balls to the walls full of über talented lady people. I can say that with conviction, and authority now, because it’s officially true. The last few days have been a slow avalanche of casting announcements for the Mockingjay films, and one after the other have been bona fide, award nominated, winning, and just all around talented women.

Today we got our Commander Paylor with the announcement of Tony Award winning actress Patina Miller, if you don’t know who she is, click here and get to know her. Monday we got our Commander Lyme with the announcement of American Horror Story: Asylum’s Lily Rabe, and then last Friday we got the imagesannouncement of Julianne Moore taking the role of President Alma Coin. I don’t know about you, but the next female role to be cast, the expectations are now so incredibly high, I’m hoping we get another prestigious award nominee, or winner– because it’s just becoming a kind of a pleasant trend.

We already knew that the female cast of this franchise was super talented, especially with Jennifer Lawrence at the helm. But now, after already having such talents as Paula Malcolmson, who I am seriously hoping is utilized more in Catching Fire, because I don’t know if you know this– but Paula is no slouch where it comes to acting ability. Watch Showtime’s Ray Donovan, and HBOs Deadwood, as well as her stint on Sons of Anarchy, you’ll understand why I’ve said all of that. Sometimes I forget just how vast the collective female talent is in the cast, but then I remember there’s women like Jena Malone, and Amanda Plummer taking part. Maybe it’s because we haven’t actually seen Catching Fire yet, and that’s why my memory keeps getting fogged up, but in all seriousness the cast is almost something unprecedented, and I can only think of two other films cast that were just as well populated by talented women, and that’s The Hours, and Gosford Park.

Bring on the Boggs, but if we’re keeping with the trend… bring on the Fulvia Cardew, maybe we’ll get someone a million times better than Rebel Wilson.

Them There Eyes

Spare News

mockingjayMockingjay casting news is just, spare. So, when even some paper I’ve personally never heard of prints a tiny article stating that such and such, or so and so, is in talks with Lionsgate about a role in Mockingjay— I sadly pay attention. Actually, I kind of have to, it’s that or I write a retrospective on why I wish Taylor Swift hadn’t been included on The Hunger Games soundtrack. And who the hell wants that?! I surely don’t. Here’s the deal, so far only two people have been rumored to have had supposed conversations with the Mockingjay films’ casting department, that I can remember, and they are Rebel Wilson— and the weirdest rumor yet, William Levy

You read me right, and if you’re at all like me, you’re doing a little um, well “what the fuck!”-ing, right now. Yes, with arm movements, jerky ones, perhaps you’ve dislocated your shoulders in this process, maybe you’ve fallen off your chair, or your sofa, maybe you’ve gravely frightened some people on public transit who are sitting near to you? I

Shhh, don't say a word William.

Stuff and other stuff, eyes.

dunno, I’m not you, I am me– and I think the idea of William Levy, Spanish language soap opera star, Dancing With the Stars contestant, and also the guy who hits on a giant brown M & M in a commercial, allegedly being in talks to take a role in Mockingjay is the weirdest thing I’ve heard since a friend of mine told me she likes Velveeta. Yes, because this just makes the most sense ever, the guy who people thought would make a good Finnick, even though he’s clearly very much so over 30, (he’s 33), is a shoe in for some role none of us ever thought of him for, because we’re brain dead, or dead already. Guys, am I dead?

Okay, melodramatics aside, this is all just a rumor, unsubstantiated by a paper I had never heard of until yesterday afternoon. So, I’m not going to get ahead of myself entirely, I’m going to say this: If there’s any truth to this rumor at all, he’s clearly a better actor than I thought he was. However, I can’t help but go further and flail over the fact that there are simply no logical roles for him to be up for, at least not when examining the roster of characters initially. I mean, there’s Boggs, who’s middle aged, there’s Doctor Aurelius, who yeah– that’s not working, and then there’s characters like Pollux, Castor, and Messalla. If I was Debra Zane, which clearly I am not, Levy would be up for a role of someone from the Capitol, ’cause he’s a very aesthetically pleasing man person, and factoring in that the man has a thick Cuban accent that he cannot put off, my money’s on Pollux. Why? Because he doesn’t speak… at all. But who’s gonna play Castor!?

Guys, I really don’t like that Taylor Swift was on The Hunger Games soundtrack.

Them There Eyes

Rebel-lious

It’s an odd day in Hunger Games franchise news-dome, and all because there’s no Liam Hemsworth tidbits to relate! There’s other ridiculousness however, which either tickles you greatly, or makes you scratch your head and say, “what?” Today something resembling news broke, and it is that the comedienne Rebel Wilson allegedly has had a meeting with Lionsgate about her taking a role in Mockingjay. There are all kinds of questions behind this so-called development in the much awaited, and anticipated casting of Mockingjay, and the first question that crossed my proverbial lips was “are you serious?” Let me be crystal clear on one thing, I like Rebel Wilson, I’ve seen Pitch Perfect, Bridesmaids, and Bachelorette, and I think she’s an apt comedienne, a talented singer, and savvy lady person– but do I think she fits in the array of actors that already make up the existing cast of The Hunger Games franchise? Not so much.

Sheffield_Rebel_Wilson_0246

Rebel, all dolled up and ready for a fight– to prove herself?

Friends of mine, and fellow fans as well, have speculated that if there’s any legitimacy to Rebel’s statements, she’s only “right” for a very small number of roles. Aside from the Capitol citizen with the sausage, and going by her statement that the role is a Capitol citizen, she could be up for the role of Cressida: The rebel Capitol citizen who’s the director of all those notorious propos made to be broadcast to the districts, and later hacked onto the air in the Capitol. She’s described as a young woman with a shaved head, and green vine tattoos. So, for all intents and purposes her physical description is as vague as basically every other secondary character invented by Suzanne Collins. Next we have Fulvia Cardew, aka Plutarch Heavensbee’s uptight assistant. Fulvia’s physical description is vague, (I know– such a surprise), plump cheeks, and silver tattoos gracing said plump cheeks. Rebel’s no Skinny Minnie, we know this, and I don’t begrudge her her size– she’s what I like to call normal, and it’s a welcome sight to those of us who haven’t worn single digit sized jeans in almost a decade. Fulvia is the only character I can realistically see her being up for, but I’m still extremely wary of the thought as I would initially see her casting as a gimmick. All that being said some of the best actors out there make their bread and butter with comedic roles and projects, whilst interspersing or finally being offered dramatic opportunities, and more often than not they do fantastic jobs. Think Robin Williams, Jamie Foxx, Billy Crystal, Albert Brooks, Steve Martin, Jack Lemmon, Danny DeVito, Whoopie Goldberg, Jim Carrey, Mo’nique, Bill Murray, and Patton Oswalt. So, while I’m all twisty and worried, I know that if Rebel is anything like her more seasoned counterparts, she’s probably more than capable of doing a sobbingly moving job in serious work, because comedians are the worlds best observers, and interpreters of human behavior, and the human condition.

You literally have just witnessed my coming to terms with, and being okay with Rebel Wilson being possibly cast in Mockingjay. But only if she’s Fulvia.

Them There Eyes