The Captain and the President

DISTRICT13_RUINSI said it last week, and it still holds true– I could write a fantasy-casting article everyday for a month, and I’d still have ideas. Well, here I am again, and until the drudgery of pretty no worthwhile Catching Fire and/or Mockingjay news ceases, you’re stuck with me living in a fanciful haze. Yeah, yeah, Judianna talking up about her inspiration behind Katniss’ Interview dress is groovy and everything, but personally– I don’t want to know, because I’m a snob who thinks she got the dress deadly wrong. So, not going there. And the Oscar race, and the multitude of Jen sound-bites, it’s just too joan-cusack-picture-5much for me to all take in right now. Fan-casting is a safe haven for me, and when this duo came to my mind in a fit of sleep deprived genius, my heart leapt with joy– or maybe I was just dehydrated? They’re siblings, and they’ve worked together several times, and their dynamic is something to revel, and basically bathe in, because it’s so weirdly good. They are Joan and John Cusack. Just ruminate on this for a sec, and then come back to the facts: John’s 46, fit, well over 6 feet tall, a trained kick boxer (yes, those moves he displayed in Say Anything were real, as were the ones in Grosse Pointe Blank), an extremely versatile actor, reputable, and has played stoic, military, and fatherly roles before. Joan is 50, not quite as successful as her younger brother, but I’ll never hold that against her, she’s a hard worker, talented, extremely funny, and everything I’ve ever seen her in she’s more than good. John, of course in this fantasy casting is Captain Boggs, and Joan is the steely President Alma Coin, if you haven’t figured that out from the title, and everything.

Maybe I just really like the idea of them pairing up again, because it’s been 13 years since their last project together (High Fidelity in 2000). Also, maybe I just really like the idea of JohnCusack_thumb%255B2%255DJoan taking someone on who’s on a whole different level of scary than she’s taken on before. Because, even though I know she’s working on the Showtime series Shameless right now, I’d like to see her in something that I’d willingly watch. Fact: I didn’t like the UK version of Shameless, I’m not even up for trying out the US’s. Not even James McAvoy kept me interested in the series– and he was naked, and screwing his now wife on the kitchen floor. The characters no matter what accent they’re using are entirely unappealing to me. But, about Joan though, she may not be the icy beauty some of us had in mind, but she’s a solid choice if they ever make one. As for John, just– do I really have to make a case for John? He’s been doing this acting thing for about 30 years, and he’s probably not going to stop until some Libertarian takes him out with a truck, or– y’know, old age? There ya’ go, two people checked off my list for possible Boggs’, and possible Coins, and yes– they’re really long lists. 

I won’t be done until these roles are truly cast. And even then I will continue to fan-cast these roles for the remakes that will be done in about 15 years.

Them There Eyes



  1. I like the Shameless. Joan for Coin? I am not sure. I was thinking Uma Thurman would be good. Boggs well I am still going for Bradley Cooper. He looks good as a cop in his next movie. They would need to cut his hair in a crew cut style. He would rock that part well.

    1. Uma Thurman is too young and too conventionally beautiful. Yeah, I know that most of the actresses fancasted are more or less attractive (it’s Hollywood afterall), but Coin should be a plain-looking, stern woman in her 50s, not someone who looks like a supermodel.

      I’m a bit puzzled by the idea that many want an “icy beauty” for Coin? That’s not who Coin is supposed to be. Icy yes, but beauty, no. Any actress they cast should look as plain (you can do that with makeup or the lack of it, hair etc.) and dress as dowdy and stern as possible.

      I can’t see Joan Cusack as Coin either… maybe because in every role I’ve seen her in, she’s been funny-likeable or funny-unlikeable.

  2. I never thought about Joan Cusack as Coin, but I love it! Not sure about John as Boggs, I always pictured someone a little beefier… if that’s even a word.

    I basically pictured the mom from Archer as Coin and since Jessica Walter (or Lucille Bluth for you Arrested Development fans) is too old I’m happy to hear about other actresses.

  3. Well the Dynamic Sibling Duo would take this in a totally different direction. Having seen just about every movie from their “glory” years together, I can easily picture their chemistry. And though I haven’t thought about it much, Boggs does work for Coin. But to visualize them in these roles that I’ve so far pictured as individuals, separately, will require some day dreaming today.

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