Hm, well today we learned some stuff, and apparently I have an opinion on it– ’cause face it, I have an opinion on pretty much everything, including the most mundane, like men’s undergarments. Lionsgate is suing “an alleged counterfeiter,” cool, huh? Well not for the party being sued, and come to think of it, it’s not that cool for the people who bought the counterfeit merchandise thinking they were buying the real deal. My opinion on this matter is pretty simple though, it’s too bad that this franchise has been exploited in this manner, but it’s almost sort of to be expected.
Which brings me to the juicy stuff, okay not juicy like… I’ve been privy to secret meetings, where Lionsgate has been strategizing on how to cut these baddies down to size. Nope, the juice is this– I pretty much don’t like any of The Hunger Games merchandise that’s been put on display for the masses. Maybe it’s because I’m not a merchandise person at my core, sure if I like a band’s T-shirt, and I’m at their show, if I’m flush, and also if the merchandise booth guy is cute– I might deem the purchase of it to wear when I work out. However, I haven’t bought a band T-shirt for over seven years, and I’ve been wearing my Barenaked Athletics T-shirt at the gym since probably 2000, and I have to say it literally looks the same way it did the day I bought it over ten years ago (that’s quality merchandise, yo), sadly the design was discontinued some time ago– and I know you’re all very sad about that.
Hunger Games merchandise is a whole other story, and here’s the rub– I own none. And here’s the reason(s) why: Quality, it’s not up to my standards, especially considering I have ten-year old band T-shirts that have stood up to rigorous use, sweat, and thousands of washings– kind of a no brainer, right? The only quality pieces I’ve seen in the line are the 74th Games Tribute coats. Design, I have seen nothing in the line of merchandise that says “we really thought this one out!” Nope, because light bulbs with the Mockingjay on it, says to me, and maybe to other people “12 year-olds are gonna love this!” And maybe that’s my problem? I’m not 12. I also will never ever want to walk around with Josh Hutcherson’s face emblazoned across my chest, really. Variety, I’m not a collector, unless you count souls– but I don’t want a doll of Katniss Everdeen, or sheets with Josh Hutcherson’s blond head stitched in too bright colors across the pillow cases. Which brings me to the biggest disappoint for me, the jewelry. I bloody detest the jewelry that has been made available, and that sports the iconic Mockingjay with an arrow in its beak. It’s cheesy, and it all looks shoddily made to me. When I envisioned Mockingjay themed jewelry I pictured sturdy metal pieces fashioned together with care and forethought, designed by designers with vision and artistic merit. What we got is made of metals that will go green, will bend and break, and looks like it has been made from a mold that’s been used so many times that the details have started to erode. Perhaps as the film series progresses they’ll come out with higher quality jewelry pieces, perhaps even come out with a premium line made of real gold, and real silver– for now though we’re stuck with pieces that I feel like I could buy out of the array of gum ball machines outside my local grocery store, and having counterfeit versions on the market, with even poorer quality control– yeah, not good.
Or, maybe I just want to be decked out from elbow to wrist with replicas of Finnick’s bangle.
Them There Eyes